Meetings Never Start on Time

Dear Pragmatist,

I work in a place where the meetings never start on time. I look around at the number of people wasting their time and I get irritated.

You are not alone; however, getting irritated isn’t the answer. This happens everywhere, although there are some work place cultures where meeting starts are worse than others. I have even had occasion to work for senior executives who came in late as a way to demonstrate their importance (pretty old school, huh).

I always bring something from my ever-growing “to read” stack; that way I use the waiting time productively.

The real leadership lesson here is to not get angry. It will sour you and the people around you.

Patience and productivity will serve you better than grumbling.

Getting Out of the Box

My latest read is Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box. Presented by The Arbinger Institute, it identifies a single cause at the heart of leadership problems, one that lies beneath issues of behavior or skill or technique. The problem is self-deception.

The book is like a short novel about a new employee and his interactions his boss and others. (I am in the minority because I found it tiresome after a while.)

Back to the title - the foundational question is whether we are “in the box” or not. “In the box” refers generally to viewing others as objects and behaving in ways that inflate our self-importance while diminishing others.

What is interesting about the premise of self-deception is that it starts with you betraying someone (for example, by blaming others or hogging credit for something that you didn’t do) and then justifying your behavior by blaming the person you just wronged.

We deceive ourselves into thinking that we’re doing the right thing for the right reason, even though we’re really just serving our own self-interest.

We really do know what the right thing to do is, but this constant cycle of self-justification becomes such an ingrained habit that it’s hard to break.

So...do the right thing. Accept responsibility.

HCHP - ever heard of it?

This acronym stands for high-commitment and high-performance.

I recommenced you read the HBR July-Aug 2008 article The Uncompromising Leader.

The authors’ premise: HCPH leaders are able to balance the tension between people and performance, refusing to choose between people and profits.

Their four leadership strategies are:

- earn the trust of the organization by being open to the truth
- be deeply engaged with people
- mobilize people through a focused agenda
- build strong leadership teams

My acronym: SMART.

Happy Team?

I just ordered Leading Through Conflict: How Successful Leaders Transform Differences into Opportunities.

This is a hot topic for me: how to embrace differences in opinions and styles; keeping them from becoming negative and ugly-critical but not stifling different points of view.

Artificial harmony – when everyone agrees with each other – is a symptom of a workplace that is broken.

Healthy teams require healthy conflict – and that means speaking up and getting important issues and disagreement out on the table.

So, speak up. Just remember, it is O.K. to disagree but don’t be disagreeable.

Check Out Aretha

Treat Me Right

Seriously, how hard is this? And I mean real respect not just courteous behavior.

We don't feel respected when:

- We are ignored.
- Others make decisions about us without our input.
- We are not asked what we think we need.
- We are not taken seriously.
- We are lied to.
- We are not asked for our ideas.

Starting today - encourage coworkers to express their opinions and ideas and then use those ideas or pieces of those ideas to change or improve work.

The M-Word

Morale…How many conversations have you been involved in that centered on improving morale? And how many of them remain focused on symptoms and not substantive issues of employee motivation and company vision and values?

The fact is, the majority of departing employees do not express dissatisfaction before they leave. I also believe that generally the best leave.

This is an area that continues to see organizations not walk the talk. The talk: people are our key to success. The reality: people are under-utilized, under-trained, under-paid and under-motivated.

If you want a quick gauge of how your firm is doing as far as recruiting and retaining talent, then ask this simple question, “Would you recommend to a friend that they work here?” If the answer is negative, then you have a real problem.

The Next Bill Engvall?

Dear Pragmatist,

I come across sometimes as driven. While there is some positive in that, I believe there are negative aspects to that as well. Any thoughts?

I know a guy who was really intense at work. But he recognized it and worked to make himself more approachable. His solution – he used humor. And not humor aimed at other people, but self-deprecating humor. He got people to laugh and open up. He was still driven but he was much more human.

Try it. You never know, you may be funnier than you thought.

See Bill Live